Friday, February 5, 2010
The Bean Jar
A bean jar is a great way to encourage your children to do just about anything. It can help with behavior, potty training, cleaning up toys, tv time, or anything else you can think of. We have been using it in our house to encourage our children to be nice to each other and do their chores. Anytime they accomplish something we have asked them to do they get to put a bean in the jar. They also get to put a bean in the jar if they are nice to their sibling and their sibling lets us know how nice they were. It is kind of reverse tattling-which it has also improved. We had a tattler that doesn't tattle nearly as much. Instead she tells me nice things about her sister. When the jar is filled the kids decided they wanted to do a movie night and pop popcorn. Any prize works-we found that if we just ask our kids what they would like to do it helps motivate them more. It is amazing how much this simple jar has helped our house. Our kids are quicker to help out when asked and they are also so nice to each other. So has anyone else ever tried the bean jar? What worked and what didn't?
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
AMI Tonight!
Join us tonight at 7pm for American Mother's Free Parenting Class! We'll discuss some basics of human behavior that just might explain why your kids are acting how they're acting, and why you're responding how you're responding! As always, we'll help each other with great ideas and support and get pumped up for another month of parenting!
Tuesday, January 20
7 - 8 pm
Peckham Community Center (Corner of Kimball and Everett in Caldwell)
Tuesday, January 20
7 - 8 pm
Peckham Community Center (Corner of Kimball and Everett in Caldwell)
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Christmas Party!
We hope everyone can come to our Christmas Potluck. We'll have our regularly scheduled parenting class, as well as share our favorite Holiday goodies. Please bring a finger-food, treat, or appetizer to share and come ready to have fun.
We have a big announcement to share at the meeting!
See you there!
Date: Tuesday, December 1
Time: 6pm - 8pm
Place: Peckham Community Center 715 Everett St. Caldwell (corner of Kimball and Everett)
We have a big announcement to share at the meeting!
See you there!
Date: Tuesday, December 1
Time: 6pm - 8pm
Place: Peckham Community Center 715 Everett St. Caldwell (corner of Kimball and Everett)
Friday, November 20, 2009
Time-In or Time-Out?
Skill: Time-In
When to use it: All the time, especially if you want time-out to ever work
In a nutshell: Before a parent can ever use time-out effectively, "time-in" has to be well in place. "Time-in" is the fun, reinforcing, safe, and enjoyable environment in your home. When a home has a positive feeling, a child removed to time-out knows he is missing out on the good stuff. If time-out is not going well, maybe it is because "time-in" is lacking. Try increasing the encouragement, attention, physical and verbal affection, and just plain fun that happens at your house. But be careful...having great "time-in" times may just about eliminate your need for much "time-out!"
Try this: How long has it been since the tickle monster visited your children? What about a hungry bear who loves it when children wake him up from hibernation so he can eat them up? Where are your bubbles? Hoola-hoops? Face-paints and funny hats? Today, instead of just finding stuff for your kids to do, PLAY with them! Be silly and enjoy the magic that happens by making a child laugh. What are your favorite ways to play? Share your best!
When to use it: All the time, especially if you want time-out to ever work
In a nutshell: Before a parent can ever use time-out effectively, "time-in" has to be well in place. "Time-in" is the fun, reinforcing, safe, and enjoyable environment in your home. When a home has a positive feeling, a child removed to time-out knows he is missing out on the good stuff. If time-out is not going well, maybe it is because "time-in" is lacking. Try increasing the encouragement, attention, physical and verbal affection, and just plain fun that happens at your house. But be careful...having great "time-in" times may just about eliminate your need for much "time-out!"
Try this: How long has it been since the tickle monster visited your children? What about a hungry bear who loves it when children wake him up from hibernation so he can eat them up? Where are your bubbles? Hoola-hoops? Face-paints and funny hats? Today, instead of just finding stuff for your kids to do, PLAY with them! Be silly and enjoy the magic that happens by making a child laugh. What are your favorite ways to play? Share your best!
Time-In or Time-Out?
Skill: "Time-Out"
When to use it: When a child's behavior cannot be ignored or redirected, or the child's behavior is taking over the situation and has become the object of everyone's attention. Examples may include a child who is hitting other children and interfering with their positive play, or a child who is out of control and throwing objects.
Ages: Best for around ages 2 - 7. Much younger children don't usually get it, and other discipline forms like removal of privileges work better for older children.
In a nutshell:
Don't: Threaten, yell, scare, or become otherwise ugly and mean. You can be firm and still remain in control.
Don't: Threaten time-out. Think about it..."Do you want to go to time out?" is not a very intelligent question.
Don't: Apologize for putting a child in time-out. Appropriate discipline doesn't need apologies.
Do: Use a less-intensive method of intervention when possible, such as changing the mood with humor, ignoring inconsequential behaviors, or using the stop-redirect-reinforce method. When a behavior needs a time-out, be prepared to follow through to the end.
Do: Find a non-scary but totally dull location for time-out.
Do: Say something like, "When you behave this way, you may not be with us."
Do: Lead the child to time-out. Say, "When the timer goes off, if you are behaving nicely, you may come and see me."
Do: Set a timer for 30 sec per year up to age 3, and 3 minutes past calm down after age 4.
Do: When the child completes the time-out and comes to you, smile and say "I'm glad you...." and be about your business. Be positive and MOVE ON.
Try this: Role play "going to time-out" with your child. When things are going well and the emotion is neutral, teach them your expectations. Let them know which behaviors will result in a time-out. Show them where it is, practice going there and setting the timer, and practice coming out.
When to use it: When a child's behavior cannot be ignored or redirected, or the child's behavior is taking over the situation and has become the object of everyone's attention. Examples may include a child who is hitting other children and interfering with their positive play, or a child who is out of control and throwing objects.
Ages: Best for around ages 2 - 7. Much younger children don't usually get it, and other discipline forms like removal of privileges work better for older children.
In a nutshell:
Don't: Threaten, yell, scare, or become otherwise ugly and mean. You can be firm and still remain in control.
Don't: Threaten time-out. Think about it..."Do you want to go to time out?" is not a very intelligent question.
Don't: Apologize for putting a child in time-out. Appropriate discipline doesn't need apologies.
Do: Use a less-intensive method of intervention when possible, such as changing the mood with humor, ignoring inconsequential behaviors, or using the stop-redirect-reinforce method. When a behavior needs a time-out, be prepared to follow through to the end.
Do: Find a non-scary but totally dull location for time-out.
Do: Say something like, "When you behave this way, you may not be with us."
Do: Lead the child to time-out. Say, "When the timer goes off, if you are behaving nicely, you may come and see me."
Do: Set a timer for 30 sec per year up to age 3, and 3 minutes past calm down after age 4.
Do: When the child completes the time-out and comes to you, smile and say "I'm glad you...." and be about your business. Be positive and MOVE ON.
Try this: Role play "going to time-out" with your child. When things are going well and the emotion is neutral, teach them your expectations. Let them know which behaviors will result in a time-out. Show them where it is, practice going there and setting the timer, and practice coming out.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Family Friendly Shopping Week
(October 25 – November 1, 2009)
We’ve all been there…waiting in endless check-out lines with our children. Maybe we’re so worried about keeping them from grabbing gum and snickers bars that we’ve become complacent about the danger placed right at their eye level—the racy images and sexually-charged headlines that surround them as we wait to check out. More than one parent of an emerging reader has been asked, “What does S-E-X spell?” Each month the magazines get worse as the headlines become more illicit and the use of profanity increases.
Since silence equals acceptance, will you join other parents this week and let businesses know we will not patronize their stores at the expense of our children? During White Ribbon Against Pornography (WRAP) Week, please let your voice be heard. Support businesses that do not display material inappropriate for children to see. Let businesses who display these inappropriate materials know that you will not shop there this week. Respectfully ask them to follow the lead of thousands of other stores by covering inappropriate material, removing the material from sight, or creating a “family-friendly” check-out line. You could do this by calling the store manager, writing a note on the comment cards found at most customer service counters, emailing the corporate office for the chain, or visiting the store and speaking directly to the manager.
Please forward this on to others who may be tired of stores selling sex to kids. Let’s get it covered up or moved out this week! For more information, visit www.forevermoms.blogspot.org, a site sponsored by the Treasure Valley Idaho Chapter of American Mothers (a non-profit, non-political, inter-faith organization in support of the family). Learn about WRAP week, comment on your success, find links to great anti-pornography websites, and learn more about protecting children from the effects of pornography.
Join us in shopping “Family-Friendly!”
Alison Moulton
Elizabeth Neratko
Leslie Simmons
Valerie Christensen
We’ve all been there…waiting in endless check-out lines with our children. Maybe we’re so worried about keeping them from grabbing gum and snickers bars that we’ve become complacent about the danger placed right at their eye level—the racy images and sexually-charged headlines that surround them as we wait to check out. More than one parent of an emerging reader has been asked, “What does S-E-X spell?” Each month the magazines get worse as the headlines become more illicit and the use of profanity increases.
Since silence equals acceptance, will you join other parents this week and let businesses know we will not patronize their stores at the expense of our children? During White Ribbon Against Pornography (WRAP) Week, please let your voice be heard. Support businesses that do not display material inappropriate for children to see. Let businesses who display these inappropriate materials know that you will not shop there this week. Respectfully ask them to follow the lead of thousands of other stores by covering inappropriate material, removing the material from sight, or creating a “family-friendly” check-out line. You could do this by calling the store manager, writing a note on the comment cards found at most customer service counters, emailing the corporate office for the chain, or visiting the store and speaking directly to the manager.
Please forward this on to others who may be tired of stores selling sex to kids. Let’s get it covered up or moved out this week! For more information, visit www.forevermoms.blogspot.org, a site sponsored by the Treasure Valley Idaho Chapter of American Mothers (a non-profit, non-political, inter-faith organization in support of the family). Learn about WRAP week, comment on your success, find links to great anti-pornography websites, and learn more about protecting children from the effects of pornography.
Join us in shopping “Family-Friendly!”
Alison Moulton
Elizabeth Neratko
Leslie Simmons
Valerie Christensen
Marketing to Children
(April 2009)
The April 2009 Cosmo cover features High School Musical and Disney Channel star Ashley Tisdale. This is an example of direct marketing to young people. How many little girls, tweens, and teens do you know who are obsessed with High School Musical and its stars? I’m sure this magazine made its way into more than one collection.
The April 2009 Cosmo cover features High School Musical and Disney Channel star Ashley Tisdale. This is an example of direct marketing to young people. How many little girls, tweens, and teens do you know who are obsessed with High School Musical and its stars? I’m sure this magazine made its way into more than one collection.
Sample Cosmopolitan Headlines
(April, May, June, July 2009)
Sorry to print them, but we need to be aware of the headlines that are placed at child eye-level in many store check-out lines. How would you like your kids sounding out these titles? They will continue to print and display such headlines as long as the public continues to accept them.
GET BUTT-NAKED! 50 FUN THINGS TO DO BARE-A##ED
SEX HE CRAVES: WE HELP YOU DISCOVER HIS MOST DIRTY-LISCIOUS FANTASIES—SO YOU CAN DELIVER THE NAUGHTY GOODS
BEST. SEX. EVER. OUR GUTSY NEW TIPS ARE GUARANTEED TO GIVE HIM THE MOST BADA## ORGASM IMAGINABLE. AND YOU TOO!
BE A LUCKY B####! THESE PROVEN MIND TRICKS BRING YOU WHAT YOU WANT
VIRGINS IN COSMO! (WE THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME)
THESE HOT MOVES WILL START A BONFIRE IN HIS PANTS…AND HIS HEART
SAVE YOUR A## AT WORK
What Can I Do?
The only things necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.
—Edmund Burke
- WRAP Week is from October 24 – November 1, 2009. During this time, choose at least one activity to help fight the influence of pornography on our communities.
- Have a Family Meeting to discuss this WRAP information from this blog. Distribute it elsewhere.
- Visit www.moralityinmedia.org to learn about wearing and ordering white ribbons, requesting anti-pornography proclamations from government leaders, providing clergy with information for sermons, requesting legal enforcement of obscenity laws, and making complaints about internet pornography.
- Visit www.strengthenthefamily.net for information on getting a child-friendly resolution passed by your local City Council and asking businesses to cover material not suitable for children.
- Join the Treasure Valley Chapter of American Mothers by participating in the WRAP week “Family-Friendly Shopping Week.” During the period of October 25 – November 1, 2009, shop only at stores that cover or remove material not suitable for children to see, such as Cosmopolitan magazines. In whatever way is most comfortable for you, respectfully let the store know why you won’t be shopping there during this week. You could visit the store manager in person, call on the phone, write a letter or email, or register a complaint on the corporate website. You can find the appropriate place to complain by searching online with “Contact us” and the name of the store. Be sure to also express gratitude to managers who are covering inappropriate material.
- Just do something—because our community’s kids are counting on us!
Why do I Need to Protect My Children From Pornography
As seen previously, children are especially vulnerable to the effects of pornography exposure. Children often form ideas about relationships and sex by images they see in their childhood. It becomes part of them. Here are some ways to help keep children safe from these negative images:
- Keep all inappropriate material out of your home. Children can become desensitized easily.
- Install effective internet filters. There is still a chance of pornography ads or pop-ups making it through, but without a filter, it will certainly show up on your computer.
- Teach children to “Crash and Tell” (from www.strenghtenthefamily.net Role-play with children what to do if inappropriate images appear on their computer or TV screen. Teach children that even though they may be curious about what they see, they need to immediately turn off the screen (crash) and tell an adult. Make sure they know they are not in trouble and they are not to blame.
- Make sure children know that the pornography industry is actively trying to expose them through pop-ups, spam emails, and chat rooms. They know pornography is addictive and they want to bring more people in and to get more money.
- Never allow children to have internet access in their bedrooms. Keep computers in a public area.
- Periodically check the History on your computer to see all sites accessed.
- Don’t give children and teens cell phones with internet access. “Sexting” (sending sexual images by cell phone text messages) is rampant among youth.
- Become involved in encouraging businesses to remove materials with sexual images and messages away from children’s view.
- Fight pornography in your community. Remember, even if you protect your children from pornography in your own home, other children may expose them, and the adults they interact with may victimize them. We need to address this as a community-wide problem in order to protect our families.
- Go to the website: http://www.cp80.org/flash/training/ english07.html for a 5-minute parent training program that helps parents set up safeguards against pornography.
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